Tag: Martial arts

Moving Beyond Techniques

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Embracing Uncertainty, Life Lessons, Martial Arts

Rick is on a never-ending quest; for many years he sought out Martial Arts masters to acquire an extensive repertoire of training methods and techniques. His insatiable thirst has also always continued to draw him into the deeper aspects of the Martial Arts beyond the physical. A quest not just for knowledge but, for wisdom and an understanding on deeper levels, not just for himself, but to share with his students.  As a teacher and guide he has always felt that his purpose was to contribute and raise the level of skill as well as consciousness. At a time where society is overwhelmed and bombarded by information he now sees even more clearly his role as emphasizing Martial Arts as a transformative process.  The most recent weekend immersion emphasized the importance of wisdom and understanding above additional information and physical drills.

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“Knowledge without wisdom is a load of books on the back an ass”  – Japanese Proverb

People entering the space on the first day seemed to not know what to expect.  Upon arriving they were handed a sheet of questions.  The purpose being to place them in a position to examine their own thoughts and reasoning’s behind their training as well as their perspectives on Martial Arts and its purpose.  The stage was set for reflection and then growth.

Rick emphasized his belief in the importance of the Martial Arts trained and taught the correct way.  True Martial Art’s training can bring about self–knowledge and then wisdom.  This wisdom has a particular emphasis in Martial Arts beyond other forms of yoga/meditation because it comes from interaction with others, not only stillness.  Interactions become not only enhanced in the training arena but also in life with all those that we come in contact with.

Rick's Crest

Speaking about the transformative process and the focus on truth Rick emphasized truth as not only the spoken word but also, being truthful with one’s self.  Exploring those deep corners of the soul that many are reluctant to venture into because of fear.  A true warrior has the strength to take off the mask he/she wears not only for others but also for themselves, to change the story we created and perpetuate in our mind.  Emphasis being that a true artist seeks truth because they can live no other way but in the ever-changing truth.  Attendees were shocked and dismayed when Rick requested not to be called Sifu anymore – “Call me Rick”.  Wow, talk about stripping away the past.  The pretense and ego of the simple title no longer serve him – TRUTH!

“To keep the body in good health is a duty… otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear.”   – Buddha

The physical drills throughout the training focused on opening up the senses individually and holistically to become more in tuned with oneself.  Bringing the once simple movements into a whole other level of understanding in tune with one’s self is key to heightening ones response to interactions with others.

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Several times throughout the weekend attendees broke into small groups to initiate more intimate conversations regarding their own journeys.  This created opportunities for those to allow themselves introspection as well as expose their own perceived vulnerability.  Rick constructed many well-placed situations and opportunities for each individual to arrive at an “Ah ha” moment.

The participants throughout the seminar asked many questions and in return Rick asked many open-ended questions to the group.  Questions to ponder and take away in contributing and encouraging an everlasting quest for truth.  Martial Arts after all, as Rick emphasized, is an ongoing transformative process.

“Walk On.” – Bruce Lee

Some Seminar Attendees
Day 2 Attendees

Case of the Missing Case

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Embracing Uncertainty, Life Lessons, Martial Arts, Travel, World Travel

A big stir was caused in Malmo during our ALMOST uneventful, in a good way, last week in Sweden.  Vitamins and supplements until recently were very difficult to purchase in Sweden.  Even today the stores are limited and the sales person cannot speak to the products at all, it is forbidden.

Upon our return to Malmo we were staying at a hotel for the first 2 days before returning to our rental apartment.  The hotel itself was lovely as was the room.  Problem #1 on the first night – our room was above the bar and there was a jazz band playing below.  The stand up bass, albeit great, was a deep boom that penetrated until after 12.  Parents out there know how precious keeping a child sleeping at night can be.  Our concern was the first night was a Thursday and although mild-mannered, on the weekends it is always “Swedes gone Wild”.  When we were told there was going to be a DJ the following night and we were close to the Little Square, party central for bars, we opted for a move to another room.  But the real trouble did not begin until the next AM…

Problem #2 – Upon waking Rick realized in our haste to abscond to the next chamber he had inadvertently left his vitamins and supplements in the drawer of the last.  Calling the front desk we were told that there was nothing listed in the log for the housekeeping and so we must wait until a reasonable hour to contact the current occupants to see if the items remained intact.  No such luck, the vitamins were not there, per the current resident of the room.  Disappearing pills really?  Some were in an unmarked vitamin box so it is speculation that someone thought that they hit the proverbial lottery.  Back and forth with housekeeping and a trip by the front desk and Rick to view the room contents, as well as a sheepish, robe covered Swed and his fetching mistress in bed, nothing turned up.  Apologies to the loving couple but from the looks of it they were in the afterglow.  We credit the staff of the hotel for their insistence with house keeping and perseverance (along with notable perspiration) that the items were returned over an hour later.  It was tenuous at best for all parties involved.

Turning Torso in the fog
Uncle Dan
Another great park near the turning Torso
Family Portrait

If you ever take a trek to Malmo, or Copenhagen for that matter, you would be amiss to not experience the remarkable waterfront architecture including the Turning Torso, the tallest building in Scandinavia which features a 90° twist, unreal, really.  The waterfront area is a created beachfront and with a truly nautical feel where Sweds congregate to enjoy the water, get some sun, and socialize.  A visit to the area places one into a completely different sensation than the city.

Rick has taught seminars in Malmo for his student Dan Johnson since 1989.  My attendance was greatly missed due to the fact that Junior High was in session. It was a difficult time negotiating with parents to let me out after 10:30 let alone cross-continental travel.  Nonetheless, Dan is one of Rick’s longest students, a dedicated martial artist and instructor, and a close friend of ours.  Plus, a very focused training partner that I enjoy training with because of his focus and concentration on the details of each motion. The difficulty each year is to expose elements of each of the arts, a session for Jun Fan, Muay Thai, Silat, and Kali.   The seminar was filled with familiar faces that we enjoy seeing each year and their improvement and dedication makes it an enjoyable place to instruct.

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Planning our route ahead we have made the decision to rent a car in Sweden and wonder our way down to our rental in the South of France about the distance from New Jersey to Florida.   Three for the road once again!

Lucky You(s)

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Embracing Uncertainty, Travel

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The past few weeks have been moving slowly at first and now faster than one can imagine.  We love Mike Lee the new owner of our precious Academy (PAMA) and have spent lots of time and energy assisting him in getting the new place spiffy and ready for the official public Open House celebration and Rick has continued to instruct through January. Yes, the business was sold in December but days have been filled with settling up the business and tax matters, organizing our personal matters to take place in our absence, and finally packing for a jaunt starting out in a foreign country.  The new PAMA is settling in and my family and myself are getting ready to set out.

We are setting off this Sunday (to parts disclosed on my next blog – bye-bye snow!).  With all of the lead-time before our outward journey began we have graciously received an outpouring of love and well wishes for our future endeavors.   Truly – the Love You Make is Equal to the Love You Take. We have had a few, very few people say Well Must Be Nice guised in a statement of “Lucky You” – no well wishes added.

This journey has very little to do with Luck but lots to do about the choices that we make in life and the courage to follow through on those choices. Now this is where the peaceful warrior and the hero come into play as the great Joseph Campbell would say. A hero is not just someone who saves someone’s life nor is a warrior a person that runs around fighting all the time. A hero is someone who goes beyond where others may go to bring something back for the good of others as well as for themselves, but the hero needs the warrior to keep up this tough journey whatever it may be. Now, people may say so what is so tough about taking time off and traveling.  If it wasn’t in one sense tough and different from what most people as a family would do, then many more people would do it.

There is a commercial on HGTV it says… “You don’t have to be rich to move to Hawaii you just have to want it”.  And that’s what it is really about, if you want it badly enough you will find a way. Rick began his hero’s journey way back when he was 18 and determined against all odds to learn the art of Bruce Lee, a story to be shared at a later date. Overcoming many, many obstacles and ups and downs he persevered.  Because of that determination thousands of students have benefited over the years.   That is the mindset of the peaceful warrior, and a hero’s journey. Another quote that we love is “This is your world shape it or someone else will” by Gary Lew.  Lucky?  Well, we very well may hit the lottery but no such luck yet.  Blessed?  Hell yes!  Rick, 20 years my senior began working at the age of 13, I began at the age of 15 and we both have been completely self-sufficient our whole adult lives.  Our strong will served and will continue to serve us well.

As those who are business owners know, in a service-based industry and something you are passionate about, your heart and soul are poured into every crevasse. These adventures we are about to partake in are not only about “fun” but to allow us the freedom that owning a business did not provide.  The freedom from everyday life, to open our minds and explore ourselves on a deeper level and truly understand what shifts we need and want to make in ourselves and how to contribute to the world in a larger way.  There are even parts of our journey that will allow us to assist and work with others along the way.

So to all those reading, thank you for the well wishes and love.  Wishing you all your own internal and external explorations and the courage to live and dream on a grand scale.  Also, for the “Lucky You(s)” I wish you love and even more valor because feelings of jealousy are no more than a mask for fear.

It is fitting that the Open House for PAMA at the new location will be this Saturday, February 1st, and we leave early in the AM on Sunday.  Both are setting out on their paths.

Bags Packed!
Bags Packed!

“Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.”  – Buddha

Honoring the Past and Embracing the Future

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Embracing Uncertainty

As I was about to pull out of 14 Farber Road to attend the first PAMA classes at the new location, I started to tear up.  Those tears were quickly replaced with a chuckle as our daughter, also a Beatles fan, began humming the oh so fitting tune… What goes on in your heart, what goes on in your mind.

The Green Room
The After

To provide some perspective, I left my parents house when I was 17, this week I departed 14 Farber Road for the last time just short of 16 of my adult years.  Comparable to when I moved out of my parents’ house I don’t have reservations that it was the proper decision but a piece of my heart, rightfully so, is subject to be tugged by those memories.

The Gold Room

Looking back, the events and emotions that took place within those walls will far greater exceed the physical necessity for the building but, after all, I literally grew up in that martial arts haven.  Like many who have joined Princeton Academy of Martial Arts (PAMA) over the years, I entered naïvely having never explored the deeper depths of my soul.  Martial Arts, if practiced in a mindful, spiritual practice will chew up your ego and spit you out.  That is why many people could not handle the intensity of Sifu Rick and the training.  I am a strong-willed person and back in the day he made me cry several times (not in public mind you).  Although I came back, many times I saw others leave and not return because the training can mirror back to you deep fears and shatter images one has and cannot bear to scrutinize.  But for me, after going through some personal life trials, it was time to be real with myself.

The Weight Room

The importance of Martial Arts, on the deeper level as it is trained at PAMA, is about truly examining and knowing yourself, not your enemies or perceived enemies.  Martial arts took on a significant role my life, being drawn closer to it while many internal transformations took place that prompted me to change my world.  PAMA was my sanctuary and many times I found refuge within those walls, especially when I felt that the outside world could not comprehend what revolutions were going on within.

The Art Gallery

Through the years, I have been blessed with many close friendships and lots of love from my fellow training partners, instructors, and my students.  Many memorable people, to many to mention, have stood with me as I experienced blood and sweat, broken bones and lifted spirits.  I thank each of them for their support, camaraderie, and laughs.  Of course fate and our love for Martial Arts brought Rick and I together many years ago and ironically, together made the choice to sell the business and take the next step of our journey elsewhere.

The Pro-Shop

If someone had asked me 16 years ago, where I thought martial arts could lead me I would have never been able to imagine my place in the world today as a Martial Artist and a Warrior.   I am enthralled that I found martial arts and ecstatic that I found myself.  As our new journey now truly begins, we welcome it with arms wide open and with the Warriors’ approach saying “YES!” to life and the path ahead.

STAY TUNED!

Watching the Wheels Go Round and Round

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Embracing Uncertainty, Martial Arts

   I wish I could say that now that the business has been sold we are relaxing with nothing to do and nowhere to be.  That day will come soon enough.  In the meantime, still purging and organizing some final things for storage and the very time consuming task of transitioning various accounts to the new owner as well as changing contact info on others.  Have you ever had your wallet stolen or lost better yet, gotten divorced?  Then you have a small idea of what work goes into setting your accounts in order.   Most like to think that the online age has allowed us the freedom to supersede human interaction but, in reality, with numerous passwords and accounts it is exponentially more tiresome.

Fond farewell!
Fond farewell!

We did take time to have an intimate gathering of our closest people to bid a farewell to 14 Faber Road.  You can tell by the picture Rick and I are torn up.  Actually, it was a night of laughs and shared memories. Rick took time late in the evening to explain some of the history of the rooms and artwork that has adorned the walls for so many years. Both of us have such fond memories, with Rick spending almost ½ his life there and myself starting when I was a nieve 23 year old.  We have grown and transformed into the people that we have become both individually and as a couple.  It has not only been a location but an anchor for our spirits to reside and feel safe to express ourselves through movement, meditation, training, and teaching.

PAMA has been the first and only place in NJ to host a long list of incredible instructors, Guro Dan Inosanto, Ajarn Chai Sirisute, Diony Canete, all the Machado brothers, and a list of now deceased masters –  Pak Herman Suwanda, Punon Guro Edgar Sulite,  Sifu Larry Hartsell,  Pendekar Paul DeThouars, to name just a few. These were not just typical seminars but, in every case, involved long hours of private lessons with Rick including lots of sweat, bloody hands from Kali stroking, injured backs & body parts, and so much more. PAMA has not just been about the base level of martial arts but, also, the spiritual philosophical path with several wonderful guides and mentors such as our close friend Khempo Tenzin Darje Rinpoche, and Shamans of Peru as well as Chi Gung instructors.

Ilaria has literally grown up with PAMA as her home, her first trip being when she was a mere 2 weeks old.  She knows Uncle Mikey bought PAMA and she has visited the new PAMA but, we are awaiting the visceral response and protests when we lock the doors one last time.  Although, maybe, that is just projection of our own fears leaving the building behind.  Interesting though, she has grown up understanding non-attachment more then anyone I know.  Especially, as a child, she freely gives up clothes and toys that are no longer suited for her age or size.   Once when I lost a piece of jewelry I was very attached to she said, “It is OK mommy, things come and things go”.  At that point I had to stop grinding my teeth and let it go.  NOTE:  If you are a parent you must get the book Pete the Cat and his Groovy Buttons.

Big girl bikes – helmets required!
Doe a Deer a female Deer!
Winter PAMA Wonderland!
In the interim, as always, we make a conscious choice to spend quality, unfiltered time with Ilaria.  We had a bit of snow the other day but, at Club PAMA, it makes no matter.  On the day of the storm, Ilaria and I spent an hour riding our bikes in the 2000 sq. ft. “green room” for fun and fitness.  Of course, then she needed to ride on the children’s bike seat on the back of mine to reenact the Sound of Music.    In typical snow day fashion, the quintessential activity consisted of Rick making an authentic hand rolled snowman.  Too bad Max is no longer an employee, Rick could have had him prep the pieces like in a cooking show and Rick could have been just the finisher for the glory!  I joke of course. Rick would never deny Ilaria the experience or have a handy craft with his name/stamp on it that was not his own work.  Rick forever the artist and craftsman!

Selling the Baby

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Embracing Uncertainty, Martial Arts
    When Rick and I first spoke of selling Princeton Academy of Martial Arts (PAMA) there were many thoughts about how do you really sell your baby.  The one that Rick birthed and raised for almost 27 years and I have known and loved for almost 16 years and have adopted.  These many years Rick has crafted EVERY detail of the Academy just so.  The attention to detail, care, and love he has poured into creating this Martial Arts Mecca, growing it from a mere seed to a World Renowned Institution.  All this was done purely for love of the Martial Arts and a passion for how the Martial Arts process can transform an individual. As other personal business owners know, we eat, sleep, and breathe PAMA.  Just like a child it was given lots of love and care.  If we sold it to someone just for a big payout, I can imagine us waking to nightmares just as one would if your daughter marries a deviant.  Whhooo, glad that has not been the case.
    I still remember the look on Mike Lee’s face when I approached him about his interest in taking over PAMA.  First it took him quite a few days to process that Rick and I would be moving on, after all, for years he has been my Chinese brother/training partner and Rick’s dedicated student for 20 years.   When I say that the three of us are close – He has traveled with us all over the world – Peru, Switzerland (2x), Sweden (5x), Paris (2x), Belgium (2x), not to mention all of the US trips, the thousand upon thousand hours of training, meals, drinks, and many, many laughs. Mike had a picture of us in his wedding slideshow as his Italian family.  We even spent Thanksgiving together this year!
The Signing
The Signing
    The closing went smoothly because leading up to it there was no infighting or no harsh negotiations between Rick, Mike, and their lawyers.  During the past few weeks before the transition Rick and I keep giving Mike additional things to help him and Rick has even decided to loan some of his more exclusive artwork to the new Princeton Academy.  Mike wants to become a successful entrepreneur and professional Martial Artist and we want nothing but success for him and for the future of PAMA.  Most closing, I imagine, are harsh, clear chop, and hand over the keys.  We are and will always be willing advisors for Mike, his extended family here for support and encouragement.
Obligatory handshake picture
Obligatory handshake picture
    Mike is moving the Academy to the new location in a few weeks and we are co-habitating 14 Farber Road but we are more then used to hanging together in close quarters.   That’s what family is about, someone who will treat your baby with the same care and intention. 

Deconstructing a Lifetime One Weapon at a Time

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Embracing Uncertainty, Martial Arts

This week presented the challenge of compressing 5800 sq. ft. academy/second home and almost 27 years into a modest 10×15 storage unit.  I liken it to the natural birth of our 9lb 2oz baby.  While the later culminated with embracing a gleaming cherub, the former not nearly as attractive, both seem to have defied the possible and given a great sense of triumph.  Although we premeditated well ahead of time the contracting of these past few weeks, the forethought did not make it any less agonizing.

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The arduous process of sorting through administration has a way of pulling you out of the emotional and into the rational.  There is no sentimentality in sorting through ancient receipts and maturing paperwork.  Although, I will say that the stacks of paper set for destruction and shredding gave a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.  Just like a home, one seems to expand into the space, and we sure did at PAMA.  I have been known to be zealous when it comes to shedding and giving away unnecessary items.  There is a certain sense of bliss in that it for me.   (Anyone need any picture frames?)

As you can tell from the video, the collections and collections of martial arts weaponry (all of which are NOT included here), personal equipment, books, and memorabilia are immense.  I am thankful that we all share the same enthusiasm for the Martial Arts so the collections will continue to be appreciated.  After moving everything into storage our daughter’s only protest was that she wanted her wooden dummy back!

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For Rick, I applaud him for his poise and grace as we undressed the walls of his numerous certificates, honors, and magazine articles.  All of which must have given him pause, as it did me, to deconstruct a lifetime of accomplishment and dedication. Stripping not just the physical but also, the attachment that is held in all of the honors and titles that he rightfully earned through years of sweat and determination.  I admired one last time the wall of his honored instructors/teachers and stood in awe at the boxes and boxes of private lessons and seminars videos that he has retained as well as his massive amounts of personal notebooks.

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Interestingly, as we delicately packed the moving truck with collectables, weapons, historical martial arts periodicals and photographic memories one would anticipate sadness but there was lots of laughter and our hearts were light.  It is freeing in a way to know that the “stuff” is just material items and really does not define us.

In closing, I would like to quote one of Ricks all time favorite artists Paul McCartney from one of his solo albums.  It is very fitting for Rick at this time.

“It’s the same me that stands here now

When I think that all this stuff

Can make a life that’s pretty hard to take it in, that was me”

Love and Knife Disarms

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Martial Arts

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Current and past students came from far and wide to reunite and live the experience one last time as a master, Guro Rick taught his last seminar as owner of Princeton Academy of Martial Arts.  It was an excellent seminar, as all of us have become accustomed to as students of Rick.   Taking advantage of the unseasonably beautiful weather, the attendees worked through various knife work drills outside in the sunshine.  Later in the afternoon things progressed inside the Academy with knife disarms, tie-ups, and Rick guiding people to brainstorm their disarms issues, using it as learning experience for the students.  The last elements covered were Kali/Silat entries and takedowns.  There was much information shared but Rick’s intention, which he made clear, was to give the attendees something that they could take home, practice, and progress with.

The mood of the day was uplifting and high energy, one could feel the electricity about the room.  The mood was blithe with over 50 attendees, many of which could not help reminisce throughout the day.   And yes, at the closing there were some eyes welling.  As I perused the group, watched Rick teach during the seminar, and spoke at closing to the group, it was difficult not to get teary and get choked up.

I believe that many others feel just as I do.  It has been nothing more than magical.  For almost 27 years Rick has made PAMA a place of solitude.  Within a group one is truly alone with oneself while training.  Uniting the mind and body daily, because no one can help, as you are getting punched and kicked or the weapon being wielded towards you.  You must be in that moment with yourself, feeling the life surge through the physical body as your human instincts kick in.  Not that of maiming or harming another but, that of self-preservation and preservation of life.  More and more in this world there are very few places where we can truly feel, understand being alive and in control of that life right down to our core.  And sometime even shaking within that core from the sheer bliss, release, and relief.

Living and breathing the warrior’s path even till his departure; Guro Rick over the years has shared not just the physical parts of the arts but analyzing and discussing the details of the human psyche.   Altering students not just in the flesh, but also in the dark corners that most people do not want to explore.   No one is truly losing Rick as an instructor, every time people train they will be able to hear his voice and visualize the motions and hopefully, more importantly, live through his guidance as courageous warriors.

He is not leaving martial arts completely nor will he be leaving his students floundering.  They will be taken care of carefully by the new Sifu Mike Lee and Lao Si Mike Wolhfert and the rest of the assistant instructors.  This blog was created as a meeting point for us to all to remain together on this journey.  I imagine that Rick and I will continue to talk about Martial Arts daily as we do now and continue to train but, I do look forward to what genius may come out of this transformative process.

Embracing Uncertainty

by Living Wherever We Are, posted in Embracing Uncertainty
Rick beginning to pack his office up. These bookshelves used to be completely full and overflowing!
Rick beginning to pack his office up. These bookshelves used to be completely full and overflowing!

The choice was made in a moment but we had talked, contemplated, and deliberated about what we were going to do for quite some time as only two Scorpios can.  The decision was made to move on from Princeton Academy of Martial Arts, a thriving martial arts mecca he had built, cultivated, and loved for almost 27 years and the life changing place that I had trained and taught for over 15 ½ years – but we would be transitioning far more then that.  The decision was made to move on from all of it, the academy as well as the traditional rules we have been told by society we must play by.  More money, more money, work and work, first for yourself then for your children until (maybe if you are lucky) retirement when you are too old or tired or set in your ways to enjoy each moment of unfettered experiences.

We have decided to step beyond it all and sell the business to our trusted friend and student then to deconstruct our lives completely.  Upon hearing the news about selling the business everyone’s first question – What are you going to do next?  To answer the question – Nothing, everything, and anything.  We are putting everything we own in storage, taking a sabbatical, and letting life lead us in the short term and then eventually in the long term.  The response from all has been a mighty WOW and positive encouragement.  And of course some Oh you are lucky — not really luck, this is a choice to put ourselves as individuals and our family first.  We are not independently wealthy but we are independent thinkers.  Anyone could do it, maybe not daring in this huge way but in everyday life and the decision that are made whether they are made from the heart and soul or from the mind, fear, and societal pressures.

To be a true Martial Artist means not only the physical excellence but researching philosophies and examining ourselves on a deep internal level.   We constantly talk and embrace, as true Warriors, courageousness and understanding that it is not truly the fight against ones enemies that we train for but to truly know oneself and how we relate to every situation and adversity.   We are taking this step as warriors not out of fear but out of love.  Allowing ourselves to decompress and to truly align with Spirit and our true selves.  Knowing all of these things, I doubt we will ever look back on this time we are entering and say we wish we had stayed the course instead of following our hearts.  We would not consider it luck but great fortune that we have made a conscious decision to truly Live Wherever We Are.

Stay tuned for more posts on:

–      What brought us to this decision?

–      Where to next?  The where, how, and why.